Misconceiving mindfulness?
Mindfulness is pretty big right now. Personally, I think that’s a great thing. I discovered mindfulness meditation several years ago and have found it very helpful for re-framing my approach to thoughts and feelings, allowing me to foster a bit more resilience and cope better with life’s inevitable stresses (although not perfectly!).
Having had some experience with mindfulness from both an academic and personal practice perspective and talked about mindfulness with many people along the way, including as part of my current PhD research, I thought I might offer my thoughts on a few of the common misconceptions about mindfulness that I have come across.
I wonder if some of these misconceptions are behind people either giving up on mindfulness practice or not giving it a try in the first place. Or people beating themselves up because they think that they are doing it ‘all wrong’, which would be a great shame.
Anyway, I hope these thoughts are helpful to any budding or current mindfulness meditators out there.
- Mindfulness meditation is about clearing or emptying my mind
It is impossible to clear our minds of thoughts! Attempts to eliminate or suppress thinking (or feeling) will likely have the inverse result, with the thoughts or feelings coming back stronger. Try not to think about a pink elephant right now. Give it a go. For the next thirty seconds do not think about a pink elephant at all. Not once. How did you get on?
The goal of mindfulness meditation is not to attempt to clear or empty our mind of thoughts, but simply to observe thoughts (and feelings, sensations) in a compassionate non-judgemental manner as they come and go naturally (which they will) and come back to our point of focus for the meditation which is often (but not always) our breath.
If thoughts arise during your mindfulness meditation practice that is absolutely normal. It’s part of being human. I’d be more concerned if nothing popped up! The process of mindfulness meditation is in noticing the thoughts, recognising them as ‘just’ thoughts, nothing more, nothing less than transient mental events, and coming back to your point of focus i.e., the breath.
2. My mind is too busy for mindfulness meditation
Sometimes we have a busy mind, sometimes we have a quieter mind. Some people might have a busy mind more often than others. We all have thoughts, we all have feelings, we all have sensations. We are all different. It’s part of being human.
You can meditate with a busy mind (or a quiet mind, or something in between) because the act of mindfulness meditation is simply in noticing when we become distracted by thoughts and bringing ourselves back to our point of focus (often the breath). If this happens lots of times, so be it, you are still practicing in mindful awareness simply by noticing the distraction and coming back to your point of focus.
3. You know, I’m just no good at meditating
There are no prizes for the best meditators! There is no competition. You cannot be good or bad. If you find that you often become distracted by thoughts and feelings when you sit down to meditate, try not to despair, or judge yourselves as bad at meditating because the concept of goodness or badness with regards to meditation does not exist (at least beyond your own mind wherein the judgement lies).
If you are noticing distracting internal events like thoughts and feelings, acknowledging them, and returning to your point of focus (i.e., the breath) I have good news to share, you are meditating! And if you have to do this over and over again because you have a particularly busy mind, you are meditating still! Over time, and with practice, the distractions may well become less frequent (the good news), but they will never go away completely (the less good news).
I wish you all the best with your mindfulness practice!
My journey with mindfulness:
I’ve racked up nearly 200 hours of personal meditation practice and have been fortunate to attend mindfulness-based practice/training associated with King’s College London and the Oxford Mindfulness Centre.
As part of my current PhD, I am looking at ways of bringing mindfulness and cognitive behavioural coaching in an integrated approach for employee mental health and resilience in the workplace.
